You know when you try and do something nice and someone just fucks it up.

A couple of weeks ago I bought a load of plants to put in a border at the front of my block in halls. It's a space that has been abused for several years now with people parking on and damaging the verge. Anyway, when I started digging I found the ground useless, so waited till today when I got some topsoil delivered.

And what did I find when I went to fetch the plants out from next to my back door - three of them had been nicked.

Bastards. If you're reading this and it was you - you can leave them outside my flat again and I'll not say anything. But I hope you're proud of your thieving - I couldn't even get the same ones again when I went back to the garden centre today to replace them. Oh and don't worry about the single gardening glove you must have also taken. I did manage to replace those.

Onanist bastard.

By the way - if anyone knows anything about fungi - are these pictures below just ordinary field mushrooms, and therefore pretty safe to eat?